Goodbye

So I decided I would start writing my blog again. I know that no one is reading it, so thought it might be a good way to say things that I wish I could say to my mom.

I miss her so much that I sometimes I can barely breath. She is the first thing I think about when I wake up every morning. I wonder why she hasn't commented on my facebook posting, or what she is doing and maybe we can get together this weekend. I can't understand a damn thing my dad is doing and saying because I didn't realize she was the one helped me understand his moods.

Who do I call when my husband is driving me crazy? Who will talk me off the edge when I hate my job? Who will help me take care of my Grandpa?

I forgot what she smells like, the sound of her voice and her smile. How do I remember her? Where is she? Why did she leave? I was not ready to say goodbye!